How good is the quality of your relationship right now?
Do you feel your relationship is not what it used to be? That initial magic and the sparks you once had seems to be lacking right now. Well, the fact is, most relationships go through a dry patch and like they say variety is the spice of life. No matter how bad your relationship with your partner is, all you have to do is bring more variety into your relationship and voila! Things will be better again.
We are all creatures of habit and you must understand that the tone of your relationship is heavily dependent on the habitual ways you and your partner behave and communicate with each other.
Take a few minutes of your time now and examine the habits you use in relating to your partner. The habits that you and your significant other have adopted play a major role in your relationship and can determine its longevity and ultimate success or failure. Establishing healthy habits can help strengthen your relationship.
Whether your relationship is currently going downhill or something even worst – the following tips may be all the magic you and your partner need.
- Learn to compromise: Once you get into a relationship compromise and sacrifice becomes the order of the day. You must come to terms with the fact that you are no longer single. Learn to shed your ego sometimes, make room for new commitments and always remember that there’ll be sacrifices.
- Make an extra effort: It all begins with that extra effort. Relationships fail because you stopped doing something for the other one. A flower blooms as long as you provide it with proper care, water, and sunlight. Treat your partner like a flower, shower him or her with constant love and support and see how your relationship will blossom.
- Respect each other’s point of view: This one is crucial. If there’s no respect, one person is often left feeling unheard, and that’s the beginning of failure in that relationship. But the presence of respect can help strengthen the relationship as you’ll both feel worthy and important to each other.
- Make goodwill deposits: Making this idea a habit can help improve your relationship in so many ways. The idea is that couples have “emotional bank accounts” with each other. Doing something nice for your partner simply means that you are making a goodwill deposit with him or her. While doing something irritating means you are making a goodwill withdrawal.
Deposits can be in the form of a gesture of respect, strokes of affection, or a sincere compliment to him or her.
- Show appreciation for one another: What happens when someone appreciates your work? Yes, you would want to do more. Also, do you remember when you first started dating, how much you admired, valued and appreciated each other? Practice this more often. Show your partner that you are grateful for them, trust me, this will work wonders in strengthening your bond over time.
- Chose alternate words: When you are angry with your partner, try substituting “I” statements for “you” statements.
Here’s an example, instead of saying “You make me furious when you come home this late,” say “I get furious when I have dinner ready but don’t know that you are going to be late.”
The “you” statements come across as more accusing and attacking, unlike the “I” statements. By using the “I” statement, you are taking full responsibility for your feelings, and that’s a better way to put it.
- Be patient when it comes to disagreement: We always want to solve a problem immediately, but that’s not always good as in some cases such excessive urgency may only heighten the tension. The fact is most people will self-correct and later return with a more positive understanding – be patient with them.
- Make yourself available: It is really easy to drift away from your partner and become disconnected from each other over time. But in order to strengthen your relationship, you have to make a conscious effort in regards to being available. Start by acknowledging those ordinary moments you share with each other rather than overlooking them. Take a moment to listen, understand, laugh and show that you are attentive to their needs and wants.
- Learn to adapt: We all have bad characters and habits, therefore having an outburst of anger when your partner exhibit small bad habits is simply unnecessary and will end up worsening the situation. Instead, learn to adapt to such habits and let those little things slide.
- Communication: I believe this was supposed to be number one on this list, but I guess I was saving it for last. We all know how important communication is; make an effort to prioritize it in your relationship. There should not be any basis for harboring of secrets. Practice effective communication and all the tips listed above, and you will definitely strengthen your relationship with your partner.
Relationships should be enjoyed not endured; even if your partner doesn’t cooperate at first, set a healthy example with your actions. Changing your own habitual behavior requires courage and a sincere effort to do so is not just rewarding but also contagious.
The quality of your relationship may end up spiraling upward to heights you never imagined.
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